who are you?
“ 20 Then Jacob made a vow, saying, “If God will be with me, and keep me in this way that I am going, and give me bread to eat and clothing to put on, 21 so that I come back to my father’s house in peace, then the Lord shall be my God.”
~ Genesis 28:20-21
What started as double joy to the parents, Isaac and Rebekah, became a source of double disappointment, sadness and shame. The twins Jacob and Esau were born to the couple after Isaac pleaded to God for 20 years because Rebekah was barren. Esau was a skillful hunter, loving the fields while Jacob was a mild man dwelling in tents. Each parent favored one. Such favoritism led to a lot of trouble in the lives of the twins.
It turned out that Esau gave way to his desire for good food that he sold his birthright to Jacob for a red beef stew, lentils and bread. The birthright which should have been sacredly regarded and cherished was thrown away in an impulse to indulge his selfish desires. What looked to him as a simple act of satisfying his hunger was in fact, an act that revealed his true nature. Discarding something that identifies him as the firstborn son, who would inherit a double portion of the father’s possessions and would become the leader of the family made him less of who he should be; who is Esau, then?
Jacob, the apple of his mother’s eyes could not be faulted regarding his brother’s actions. However, he failed to resist the selfish influences of those he loved. Was it to gratify his mother’s desires or he, himself also wanted more? Regardless, deception seemed to be a trait that stayed in the family genes. In order to receive the blessings intended for Esau, Jacob disguised himself to be his brother by his appearance and with the food he brought making his father believe he was Esau.
Esau cried with exceeding bitterness upon knowing that his father gave all the blessings to Jacob. But why should he care now? If he hadn’t sold his birthright, he wouldn’t have to worry about his future. One seemingly little mistake in the past, especially if done without remorse decides the course of one’s future.
Jacob was not spared from the consequences of his action. It’s the golden rule; do not do unto others what you don’t want others to do unto you. First, he never had a peaceful moment after he had supplanted his brother twice. He had to run away fearing the wrath of Esau who intended to kill him. So he was so grateful when the Lord appeared to him in his dream on his way to his father’s family to find a bride. The Lord declared his promised blessings to him, such as the promise given to Isaac and Abraham. And he replied, “the Lord shall be my God.”
Finally, God led him to find Rachel, the woman he loved at first sight. He worked hard to serve the family in order to have her as his wife. However, his father-in-law tricked him. Another deception! Instead of giving him Rachel, he was given Leah first. His heart was broken but he must also have been doubly disappointed as he recalls the deceptive thing he did to his own father.
His journey will be unraveled in the next chapters of Genesis. Up to this point, he focused on serving his father-in-law and eventually received blessings from the Lord, multiplying not only his descendants but also his material possessions. Were these the signs that God has forgiven him and given him peace? Has God restored him back to who he should be – the direct inheritor of the promised blessings?
Many among us continue to live seemingly peaceful and successful lives in world’s eyes but deep inside are struggling with guilt, with shame and experiencing sorrow and disappointments. The next time we talk to our friend, or even a family we should allow ourselves to be real friend, a channel through whom people may release hurts and failures and eventually find the peace that only comes from self-forgiveness and the forgiveness that comes from God.
Thank you, Jesus, for your peace.
#forgivenessfrom God #peacefromabove